Finding an outlet while on your journey through infertility is crucial for keeping your sanity. There is not a one size fits all option, however, there are many different recommendations such as journaling or tracking your experience/feelings one way or another. Sheila found her own creative outlet through drawing in a notebook. She was gracious enough to share her story with us, enjoy!
Sheila’s Story
“I didn’t blog while going through IVF, instead I kept a journal in the form of a drawing notebook that I began to fill with comics about my adventures going through IVF. I recently colorized and published my journal as a graphic novel, IF: A Memoir of Infertility.
IVF was, without a doubt, the hardest experience I had to endure. I was extremely depressed through the years I battled infertility. No matter how hard I tried to distract myself, my mind always wandered back to the question, “What if I can’t get pregnant?”
The only time I wasn’t obsessing about my ovaries and uterus was when I was at work, teaching. I was about a year into my infertility treatment when I started to journal as a way to cope with my situation. At this time, I was also teaching a class on writing comics books, so I regularly wrote short comics for my students. One night, after work, I decided to start documenting my journey through IVF as a comic. At the time, I imagined it would become a short narrative because I was just approved for my first round of IVF, so I’d be pregnant in approximately eight weeks, I thought. But the weeks turned to months and my book became longer and longer.
My diagnosis was “unknown causes of infertility,” which means the doctor ran a million tests at the start of my treatment and found nothing wrong with me or my husband. Since we were perfectly healthy twenty-eight and twenty-nine-year olds, at the time, we started with timed intercourse for over a year, graduated to IUI for six months, and then finally were given insurance coverage to start IVF.
My art helped me to cope with difficult emotions and find humor in a horrible experience. I decided to publish my story because I want people who are experiencing, or have experienced, infertility to know they’re not alone. For others, who haven’t undergone IVF, I hope they will gain an understanding of what it’s like for individuals with infertility and be better able to support their loved ones going through it.” – Sheila
Description from the Back Cover of IF: A Memoir of Infertility
“I’m pregnant!” was the last thing I wanted to hear my friends announce while trapped in my world of needles, pills, and doctor’s appointments. My social media newsfeed was plagued by pregnant bellies and happy children. I needed to vent. I needed someone to talk to about my infertility. But who wanted to talk about a depressingly empty uterus?
IF: A Memoir of Infertility is a humorous take on one woman’s struggle with infertility as she asks, “What if IVF doesn’t work? Or what if it does?”
Preview of IF: A Memoir of Infertility
I remember when I was afraid that I’d get pregnant. I was safe. I planned everything. I got married, got a dog, a house, and a family car. We were building our dream, but something was missing.
My husband and I decided it was time to have a baby. We tried for seven months before we were referred to an endocrinologist. We felt relieved to finally get some medical support. But after another six months of timed-intercourse and IUI, we were still not pregnant. It was time to begin IVF.
Get Sheila’s Book & Follow Her on IG
You can purchase Sheila’s book from her website www.sheilaalexanderart.com or on Amazon.
Instagram – @sheilaalexanderart
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